I've been so excited by people posting from GRL this week--it was wonderful to see everybody having a good time.
I didn't go for a number of reasons--one, of course, being soccer season. Mate has been very completely behind my career traveling--but soccer season, especially this time of year as it gets intense, and so near Halloween--this is hard on him. He deserved to have his back up support and cheerleader this year.
Another was money--it's not an indulgence we should make every year, no matter how fun it is!
And the third reason was my own selfishness, something I was feeling even in January, looking at my year ahead.
I love traveling, but sometimes, the best things come from hunkering down in your house and dealing with shit instead of taking off. Sometimes it's writing--and I was feeling the lack of writing all through the early part of this year. Staying home and getting writing done was a pure luxury and I've been rolling around in it. Sometimes it's housecleaning--seriously. I've been coming up with a plan to deal with my house, because as much material as its deterioration gives me to write about, it's not much fun to live. The older kids are getting an apartment together, and I have plans for Big T's room, and I'm so looking forward to giving my husband some room to work so we can finally take care of some of the home improvement that has REALLY needed to happen.
And, of course, kids.
Today we didn't do much.
Chicken showed up at eight a.m. to get her dad out of bed so they could actually GO to the pick and pull and find parts. I kicked her out and told her not to come back without donuts and coffee, and she snagged money from my wallet and did just that.Love that about Chicken!
I got a lot of random hugs, and some desultory conversation and we told each other jokes. When Mate and Chicken got home--their cars full of, well, cars, really-- or parts thereof--we watched SNL and I knit.
I'm working on a basic raglan sweater--I sort of love the top down method, mostly because in spite of owning several books on the subject, I get my kicks from figuring it out in my head and seeing if I'm doing it right. Yes, I know, I'm a sick puppy, but Squish got her sweater two years ago from this idea, and this other sweater is coming along nicely.
Small stuff--mundane stuff. But I can deal with life so much better because it's done. I know sometimes this shows up in my work-- yes, there are epic stories and epic character arcs and big, vibrant people with loud auras and intense agendas.
Every now and then, I work on the quiet people, the people who are mostly content, and who really only need a little bit of change for happiness. Not thrilling, no--but sometimes, the quietest parts of our lives can be incredibly fulfilling, and I do hope that comes through.
I know that while friends were stumbling home from GRL today, tired and partied out and happy, I was quietly energized and happy in my own way. And I know that I've made commitments for the spring that I'm excited about making. When it's time for me to get back on a plane and zoom away from my responsibilities once again, I'll be glad to know I've spent some time fulfilling those responsibilities to the best of my abilities while I was home.
And of course, whenever I'm home and I know the party is going on somewhere else in the world, I'll be giving happy, excited thoughts to my friends off playing out in the world.
But I won't be wistful or bitter--I love conventions and conferences, but I have to confess, I really am very happy at home.