Mate: Okay, so take that one--the red one--and go all the way to the right.
Mate: Now click the power off button.
Mate: Now the other remote--
Me: I can get it from here.
Mate: Well you seem to have trouble--
Me: There are five different machines to make this happen. What in the hell-- you people take a simple device and make five different--
Mate: My people?
Me: Men. This is men. This is without a doubt, MEN. YOU PEOPLE take a simple idea--an elegant idea--like the television--
Mate: Wait, five?
Me: Yes five.
Mate: Five machines.
Me: Yes five machines. There are five machines involved here.
Mate: What in the--
Me: There's the PS4--
Mate: It isn't even on!
Me: WELL THEN WHY DID I HAVE TO USE THE REMOTE?
Me: So there's the PS4, there's the whatever other box that is, there's the red remote, there's the black remote and there's the television--
Mate: YOU'RE COUNTING THE TELEVISION?
Me: The television started it.
Mate: So a laptop is three devices?
Me: It's one. It is self-contained.
Mate: Unless it's a keyboard attached to a dongle.
Me: THAT is not my idea. You did that. You attached things to my computer and said, "Well, where. This is what you should do." But I've taken it other places--it's really very self sufficient without the two dongles and the keyboard and the mouse.
Mate: But those things help you.
Me: But they're complicated.
Mate: You're awful.
Me: Want a remote?
Me: WHICH ONE??????
Mate: You're still awful.
Me: Fine. I'm awful. Go count your technology bits. It will make you feel better about my awfulness. They're hanging out all over the place.
Mate. Fine. Just remember--turn on the box, and the TV, and the X-Box.
Me: I'm going to go type on my keyboard attached to my dongle attached to my laptop. Because THAT I understand.