Okay, so the number of things I'm working on is outnumbered only by the number of things I SHOULD be working on but can't get to.
A. Editing Fish 4
B. Finishing Fall Games
C. Writing the class for Fiction Haiku
D. Answering an e-mail that's two weeks overdue
E. (laughs hysterically) Newsletter that's six months overdue? Holy Goddess is it SIX MONTHS OVERDUE?
F. *lapses into weeping* Update my website? *chokes on a laugh/sob*
G. *hysterical laugh cycle starts again* I LEAVE FOR NOLA WHEN?????
H. oh dear god. I HAVE ANOTHER BOOK DUE ON JUNE 15TH!!!
I. *waves hand* *speaks through full mouth* Don' min' me...mmmmm jus eeemin sum oo'ies... *wipes crumbs*
J. *stares into space* Wait, don't I have to come up with a worksheet too?
K. I DON'T HAVE ENOUGH SWAG!!!!
L. Oh my God, my workspace is a mess. Isn't it a mess? Who thinks I should clean my workspace RIGHT THE FUCK NOW.
M. Yeah... I'm just going to lay here and play a phone game and pretend that other stuff doesn't exist.
N. Oh shit. Like, shit. As I was composing this I remembered I have a blog tour when I get back from NOLA.
O. Amy can't take your call right now. Please leave a message and she'll get back to you when sanity returns.
We call this condition "ass deep in alligators" or "neck deep in nematodes" or "eyeball deep in iguanas" or "pit deep in piranhas" or "cock deep in crocodiles" or "brain deep in barnacles" or please... somebody... help me...
Just don't send the zoo.
Methinks I'm already there.