Thursday, June 28, 2018
A brief poll--
Say, just say, you were working on a sweater, and at the end of the first sleeve, you decided to put a thumb hole in it. But after your daugh--erm, someone tried it on, you realized that the thumb hole was on the wrong side.
And as you--or anyone, really--was finishing up on the second sleeve, it occurred to you--or anyone-- that anyone had three options. Four options. Wait-- FIVE options. That's how many options. Five. Uh-huh. That many.
A. Frog the first sleeve and re-work the thumb hole. When erm, anyone--no, no, EVERYONE hates, positively LOATHES frogging and would rather do anything else.
B. Stitch the hole closed in the first sleeve and pretend it never happened. No hole ever happened. Nuh-nuh, no hole to see here.
C. Just ignore the hole on the first sleeve. "There's a HOLE? Oh... silly me... I would ave had to work two rows special just to make a hole look like that--I WONDER what I was thinking!"
D. (Which makes me--I mean YOU-- look like only slightly less of an idiot than C) Put a matching thumb hole in the same place, which will give you the benefits of the thumb hole (ie built in fingerless mitts) but will necessitate a twisting of the sleeves.
E. Put a thumb hole in the right spot so that one sleeve is twisted and the other is not and just go, "Oops! My bad!" And pretend the whole thing was done for the sake of art like that weird statue in the backyard in downtown.
Uh, get back to me on this poll if you can. You know. Cause, uhm, asking for a friend. That's it. A friend.
So, now that THAT question is out of the way, here are the next items on the poll:
What's the best way to deal with an animal who tries to interfere with your knitting?
A. Ship the little bastard to Mars
B. Have your husband call them and make him the bad guy
C. Kick the bugger off your lap and OWN that bad guy shit!
D. Knit around the damned dog because otherwise you'll be haunted by your conscience AND he won't leave you alone.
Question 3 (this one's simple):
Do you like your laundry
A. With or
Question4--this one is about Gibbs the Guest Dog:
A. Look like she's still acclimating to her new pack
B. Look comfortable enough to fit in for a while
C. Look like she's getting TOO comfortable and should maybe go back to her crate so that Geoffie can be the center of our attention again.
Geoffie, you can't vote from my computer--dammit, I KNOW that's you!
Mate came home and wanted to watch a movie called I Kill Giants which was an AWESOME movie, and yet left us both sobbing like children. In the wake of that movie, he chose Con Air for... reasons.
At the beginning of the movie, he said,
"The most ridiculous thing about this movie is the beginning!"
So I ask you,
A. Is he right? Is the beginning when Cameron Poe gets 8 years for self-defense the most ridiculous thing about the movie?
B. Is the most ridiculous thing about the movie the unbelievable amount of 90's star wattage dedicated to what is essentially an unholy trashfire of a script.
C. Is the most ridiculous thing about the movie the flying car?
D. Is the most ridiculous thing about the movie the fact that they put all those cons on the same airplane for the same reason?
E. Is the most ridiculous thing about the movie the fact that Steve Buscemi managed to be the most frightening character in the entire cast of murderers, rapists, and villains?
F. Fuck that movie, it should end up in the dumpster of history, and we should have just watched Fast and the Furious 27 and gotten our feelings out that way.
Enquiring minds want to know!