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Thursday, April 20, 2017

Lots of Different Stuff

So, I fell asleep last night appallingly early. I think it was the last of the cold kicking my ass, and a little bit of stress, and fear of the avalanche of stuff I might not be able to get to in the next week.

But mostly being sick and actually tired.


Some kid things to laugh about...

The "Easter bunny" got chicken a pretty little summer top--that Chicken eyed like some sort of skanky 80's tube top that came with hoop earrings, lipstick, a pack of cigarettes and three rubbers.

"Really? You want me to wear this?"

"It's adorable."


"If you don't like it, give it to your sister."

"I want it!" Squish said excitedly.

I really should have gotten a picture because it was adorable. Had a flirty peasanty little collar, flowers--it looked springy and cute, and Squish with her braid and her jeans was just too cute for words. Now this is the third new thing squish has gotten in the last couple of weeks, and she was sitting in the car today on the way to school.

"I am experiencing a style transition," she said sagely. "From, you know, mostly T-shirts and yoga pants, all casual, to jeans and blouses--you know. More structured."

"A style transition," I said blankly.


"Well, good luck with that, Today's outfit is smashing."

Bless her. A style transition. When I experience a style transition I go from pajama pants to loose yoga shorts. She's actually growing up.

Now, this other thing I posted on FaceBook, and a few people looked at it and went, "Huh?"

But I think it deserves a little more attention than that, because it was ZoomBoy being AMAZINGLY clever.

Okay-- if you haven't heard this comedy bit, the rest of the story won't make sense--

Now, because I know most of you won't go listen to the comedy bit, I'll recap. (You should listen to it--it's HILARIOUS.)  It features two guys going into a diner and one of them dumping all his coins into the jukebox and playing Tom Jones's "What's New, Pussycat" seven times.   

Seven times.

Which is an eternity--especially if you listen to the song, because it's REALLY repetitive. 

Now the other song--and this one shows up in the middle of the lineup--is "It's Not Unusual"--and the point in the bit is that having it show up in the middle of the umpteenth rendition of "Whoa-a-whoa-whoa-" is like a breath of air before going back to being waterboarded again. 

So you need to keep that in mind before the rest of the story makes sense.


When we drive to dance, I am usually in zombie mode-- tired and just up from a nap that's too short.
ZoomBoy usually mans my phone as the DJ and Dropkick Murphys usually rule.

But today, he picked "What's New Pussycat."

Now is when you have to refer to the video--or just take my word for it.

Cause there I am, zombie mode, the driving dead, and suddenly Squish goes, "Hey-- did you repeat that song?"

"No," ZoomBoy said--COMPLETELY deadpan, mind you. "It's just a dip in the middle."

Suddenly my brain switched on.

"You little shit!" I laughed. "I'd better hear Rocky Road to Dublin RIGHT NOW or you're off DJ duty for LIFE!"

He could not stop cackling.

The next song was "It's Not Unusual"

Squish danced and snapped in the backseat, and I couldn't stop laughing.  

So, I got to dance and went in to watch the rehearsal. This is where (those of you who follow me on  Twitter may remember) the dance teacher shouted, "Hey! The Lane kids are lost again!" and I responded, "Stunned. STUNNED I am that my kids are lost on the dance floor." The fact is, my kids aren't bad--but they get into the mode of watching someone's feet and all their hard work falls to shit. We know it. It's a problem. They're working on it.

But in the meantime, I'm texting Mate about "What's New, Pussycat!"

He laughed, and then told me, Yeah--I got Rick-Rolled this morning. 

Oh my God. He looks so quiet. Little shit indeed.          

And on the Mate front--

Tonight I came out from folding clothes and he was watching MST3K. (Mystery Science Theater 3000) The premise is much like Cinema Craptastique, where the comedians watch the movie and rip it apart. Anyway, we're watching something in it with  Doug McClure, and Mate goes, "Oh yeah. I remember this movie!"

And I remember that when I met Mate, he was a kid barely out of high school and still living with his mom. Nobody had any money and it was the 80's-- sometimes watching shitty movies on network television was all a boy could afford, and he LOVED those movies with all his soul. 

So we had a good laugh over that, and then the next episode of the show started (one episode per crappy movie) and Mate goes, "Oh my God! I've seen this one TOO!"  

No movie is bad enough for my Mate.  (I am actually beaming with pride. It's such an adorkable quality. I could watch those shitty movies with him for the rest of our lives.)

And there you go! 

Hopefully I made up for falling asleep yesterday--but I may try to slip some fanfic in this weekend anyway.

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