Heya! Yes-- the last post was pretty bleak, and there's not much I can do about that. Many of you know that I've been on leave from my job for the last fifteen months, and you know why. You know why I'm so adamant that my work is not porn, and why I believe romance--all romance, gay, straight, and in between--is a real, integral part of life. You know why I think that writing is vital to humanity as a whole. In October of 2010, I came home in the middle of the day facing the very real possibility that I would never teach (at my old site at the very least) again. I told my husband that it boiled down to someone looking at Truth in the Dark--easily one of the most beautiful things I've ever written-- and upon seeing two male leads, pronouncing the work porn.
And Mate said the one thing I've always treasured. He said, "Well, at least it was something important."
Yes, it was important. It still is important. So Tuesday night, I cleaned out my classroom--and it was hard. The place had been used as a storehouse for six months, and it hurt, there's no two ways about it. But it's done, and I"ll post about it soon (have had the post, in fact, written for a week, ever since we knew about the resolution to the matter) but in the meantime, yesterday, the winners of the Rainbow Awards came out. Now, normally, I'm not all jumpy and squeally about awards. I'm more quietly pleased--and always, always, very grateful, and very flattered. But, well, the timing was just very very good.
A Solid Core of Alpha took second in science fiction.
Hammer and Air took honorable mention in fantasy.
Living Promises took honorable mention in contemporary.
And Amy Lane as an author was given an honorable mention here.
So here I am, up against the best of the best in my genre--and I'm not doing half bad. And what I'm doing is important. And no, folks, not even a little bit, is it porn.
So, my friend and I were cleaning out my classroom, and I had my iPod plugged into a little speaker--I wasn't kidding about the soundtrack, those were some of the songs that showed up, and, me being me, they helped. And this one was the last one, playing as I wrote the note on the board and picked up the last box. And I still love it. Will always love it. But it's always going to mean that moment to me, and I'm always going to be bleeding it out.
11 comments:
So, so sorry some people just can't see what's in front of them. On the other hand now you have more time to answer the dragon and we will all be the better for it. You are still a teacher, you're just teaching tolerance (even to the hard-of-heart). {{{hugs}}
(verification- lythe, how your soul will feel when those negative vibes go away)
Love you. You make a difference with all you do. And no one will EVER invalidate that. Those kids - they LEARNED from you, and more important things then just the 3R's. Hold your head high, Lady!
*hugs* Mate had the right of it.
And congrats on doing so well in the Rainbow Awards!
~snuggles~ I love you for so many reasons. You rock. I'm sorry that some people are idiots. :(
Somehow I missed the reason you were on leave from work - I thought it had been your choice - I'm sorry this is what really was going on.
It's unfortunate that all the people in power are narrow minded enough that they can't see a brilliant teacher in front of them.
The kids are the losers. I'm sad for you. I know the feeling of wanting to teach and not being able to.
Congrats! Rainbows after the storm are awesome!
I know porn when I see it. (It's like art!) What you do is NOT porn. (Though IMHO there's nothing wrong with porn either, and so long as it's not the really icky stuff I say it gets teenagers reading and hell to the yes.)
I'm so very glad you got these awards, to reinforce what we've been telling you -- you're good at this, you're appreciated, and you're good. Congratulations.
I will repeat one more thing I've been telling you, because it needs to be said again: You are much, much, MUCH happier doing this.
Hugs.
What happened to you is unjust and I truly hate that it happened. For whatever it's worth, I read every one of your books this year and it was Truth in the Dark that got me started on them and turned me into one of your biggest fans. In my mind, there's no question that what you write is beautiful and it touches a lot of people. I could go on about how much I love your stories and your characters, how you write them in a way that they feel real to me (this was proven by how devastated I was during a certain part of Keeping Promise Rock!). But instead, I'll just give you my sincere thanks for sharing them with the world, especially now that I know what it cost you.
So many good things have happened with your writing in the last 15 months that probably would not have happened as fast if you were still teaching. Hope the reasons to celebrate counterbalance the dark feelings.
You still teach, Amy. I look at your books and I learn from them. They make me a better writer, and I have learned so much about craft from you. What happened is horrible, but you've been an inspiration to me and will continue to be so.
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