Okay, Roxie, FINE!

(Uhm, see comments of the previous post to get the title;-)

The yarn is Red Heart Baby Soft (sport)-- some blue & brown mottled, held double strand with a J hook.

Ch 98 or so, Ch 3 dc ch 1 sc in 4th ch from hook, work a crooked shell across (2 dc, c1, 1 sc)
Ch3, turn
Work dc ch 1 sc in first ch 1 sp., work crooked shell in all ch 1 spaces across,
repeat for 6 skeins worth of yarn or until the last skein gets so tangled there's no hope for it and you don't want to waste your time with the last fifty yards or so. (It's acrylic--if it was merino handpaint I'd spend the time!)

Three rows of ch3 sc in an available space in brown Red Heart Soft Worsted (1 strand) for the edging

And the applique-- done in Red Heart Soft, dk brown, lite brown, aran, & black

Face--w/dark brown make 1--ch 4, 9 dc in 4th ch from hook--join w/ch 3 w a sl st (do so for each round)
r1--ch3 dc in first st, 2 dc in each dc around
r2-- ch 3, work 2dc, 1dc in stitches around
r3--ch 3, work 2 dc in next st, then 2 st 1 dc around
r4--ch 3, work 2 dc in next st, then 3 st 1 dc around
r 5--ch 3, work 2 dc in next st, then 4 st 1 dc around
r6--ch 3, work 2 dc in next st, then 5 st 1 dc around
r7--ch 3, work 2 dc in next st, then 6 st 1 dc around
join last round w/slip stitch and cut yarn, leaving LONG tail for sewing

Ears-- make 2
W/ light brown first
ch 4, work 5 dc in 4th chain from hook
ch 3, turn, work 1 dc in same st as chain, then work 2 dc in each stitch across, finish off, weave in ends

w/drk brown
ch 4, work 5 dc in 4th chain from hook
ch 3, turn, work 1 dc in same st as chain, then work 2 dc in each stitch across
WITHOUT finishing off, join drk brown piece w/light brown piece back to back, then sc through both thicknesses around ear, working 2 sc at the corners of the ear, join the round and cut yarn, leaving long tail for sewing.

Eyes--make 2
with aran
ch4, work 9 dc in 4th chain from hook, finish off (leave a tail for sewing)

Eyeball & nose --make 3
with black
Ch 4, work 5 dc cluster in forth chain from hook, finish off (leave a tail for sewing--leave an xtra long tail on the nose for embroidering a mouth on the muzzle)

Muzzle

ch 2, work 9 sc in 2nd ch from hook, join w/slip st (for all rounds),
ch 1, 2 st in same st and in each st around
ch 1, 1 sc in same st,( 2 sc in next st, 1 sc in next st) work around
ch 1, 1 sc in same st, (2 sc in next st, 1 sc in next two st) work around
ch 3, dc in each st around, cut yarn, leave long tail for sewing

Using photo (yes, Roxie, a photo!) as placement, sew face together-- sew the ears to the FRONT LOOP of the head itself, so you have something to use for that part of the face as you're working around. The ears themselves may be sewn flat or left to flop (I sewed them flat)--it's your choice.

And then give it to your neighbor with the two month old-- hey, it's not my fault the kid was early!!!