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Saturday, December 8, 2007

And if I warp the space time continuum...

Thank you all, I'm feeling a little less cranky and a lot more human, now that I actually devoted some time to knitting and finished the first three sections of the third edit. In fact, I'm feeling like I can actually plan for the next 3 1/2 weeks without losing my mind...shall I run some numbers by you?

2 days--this is how long I have to finish running over that 4th section to accept or reject Tink's editing. She's trying to run a 'that' intervention on me, but, like the true junkie, I find I need the 'that' patch--I can get rid of about 2/3rds of the offending over-uses, but some of them, I just can't part with. Anyway, in 2 days, I submit the whole works to i-Universe, and I can forget about the damn thing for 4 weeks, when I get my galleys. In 4 weeks, I might be human again--who knows.

2 weeks--this is how long I have to grade a ginormous stack of papers, enter a page worth of grades for 5 classes, write 2 finals, and generally wrap up my semester. But, what the hell--it's work. I mean, really...how important is that paycheck? (You're right--I've got to get my ass in gear!)

10 days--this is how long I have to knit my day care provider a pair of 'Fetching' and a matching hat before she leaves on her Christmas vacation. It doesn't sound like too much of a stretch, but, then, see all of the above.

13 days--this is how long I have to finish a pair of socks for my TA and knit 'Fetching' for my other TA. It doesn't sound like much of a stretch, but, then, see all of the above.

17 days--this is how long I have to finish a scarf, knit two men's hats, 'Dashing', ruffled fingerless mitts from the Sandi Rosner book, and a hooded poncho. In this time I also have to get the kids' pictures taken, write the Christmas letter, assemble all of my addresses-AGAIN-address the cards, send them, finish my Christmas shopping, wrap the kids stuff, decorate the house and throw my oldest son a birthday party. I also need to coordinate family events, celebrate with the short people, remind the tall young people that they're still kids and we're still a family, and make sure everybody's dreams come true on a Tuesday morning 17 days in the future. It doesn't sound like too much of a stretch, but, then, see all of the above.

7 months--this is how long I have to finish Bitter Moon II: Triane's Son Reigning. I'm 124 pages in, and the first book is about to go to press. This, I think I can do, but I'm going to have to put it away for the next 17 days. I've having withdrawals already:-)

So--I know the Harlot has tried to warp the space time continuum with limited success. I think we need extreme measures. Cloning anyone?

6 comments:

Unknown said...

Just find a wormhole like in Star Trek. Or a Q....

Amy Lane said...

(Folks, I'd like you to meet Eric, hereby known as Aerk, who is, in fact, the very first person to actually see the new book and reassure me that, no, thank the Goddess, it did. not. suck. Of course, it's taken me four more editors to believe him, but he had a tough job. And now, it looks as though he can hook me up with that space-time continuum warp!)

MadMad said...

You are so funny. I love the "that" intervention - I'm a huge anti-that-er myself, though it's a bit ironic, coming from me, the most long-winded writer ever to inhabit the planet, that there is ONE word I find objectionable and that I could ever presume to tell other people it makes their writing too wordy... I can't even write a short comment!

Donna Lee said...

If you find that space time continuum warp thing, send some my way! I try so hard to be organized at work and at home but something has to give and most times, it's home. My family puts up with me feeling stressed as work becomes more pressured but it's not fair to them. So, I throw all expectations out the window and just keep on keepin'on, just like everyone else. Good luck on getting that knitting done.

TinkingBell said...

OK fetching and hat - check Taphs blog for the 1.5 hour knitted bulky beanie (it really is 1.5 hours - less if you knit it on circs and do the knitted wrist warmers from last minute knitted gifts (around 3 hours for a pair - the pattern is also on Canada living) Replace scarves with wristwarmers and do the socks in doubleknit and call them bootsocks - get husband or children to address cards and help cook food, and organise parties. In fact, buy takeway food and send e-cards! (does this help?) The grading you could do as one (ex) professor did - number a flight of stairs and skim the pape4rs to be graded down them - the number you get is the step it lands on! then you just write up the marks. His other method was dropping them down the centre stairwell with 4 coloured pieces of paper. The coloured bits were the marker between fail/pass, pass/credit and credit/distinction - you end up with a pile and the ones under the first piece fail, the seond lot pass, the third lot get credits and the top get distinctions (you see why he became an ex-professor) Of course - you can only do this once - doing it all the time would be unethical! Is this helping at all?

Saren Johnson said...

Did you find Lene? She'd be able to help with the whole time/space problem.

Hello Eric, nice to meet you.