Monday, December 31, 2018

The Curse of the Browser History

Most writers will tell you that they're afraid their browser history is going to end them up in prison someday--but it's not just their browser history.

It's snippets of conversations they ask their friends, it's things they say when they're watching movies, it's the way they think about characters in a book or on TV.

Let's face it--our brains don't always work in ways that make sense to people living in the real world.

"So, how long would it take to die of infection after a plane crash?"

"Yeah, but in the snow?"

"But what if there's blood loss?"

"What if everyone lost their phones? Would they be peoplecicles before anyone got there?"

"Would they need cadaver dogs?"

"Can you snowboard a plane wing down a mountaintop?"

"How about with passengers?"

"What if one was tied to the wing?"

"With strips of T-shirt, of course."

"Oooh, you're right. Seatbelts from the plane would be so much smarter!"

"Could you steer that like a sled?"

"What if there was a body in the plane?"

"You know, like Romancing the Stone?"

"No, no drugs. This isn't a Johnnies book."

"No, not Beneath the Stain either. No, it's a new one. But back to plane crashes..."

"How fast do winds have to go to knock a helicopter out of the sky?"

"Does anybody not file a flight plan?"

"Okay-- good to know. So, how cold do you think it got in The Mountain Between Us?"

"No, no--I'm just wondering about the feasibility of people getting naked, that's all."

"Well, I DO write romance books. There's nakedness there."

"Well, and action adventure."

"And occasionally corpses in refrigerators and drugs in the daily newspaper supplement, but mostly there's romance and nakedness."

"Okay, fine. I'm scaring you. Did you know that cotton balls in an altoid tin soaked in petroleum jelly are used as a portable fire starter in survival situations?"

"No, I'm not going to start hauling them around in the minivan. If we go off road in Citrus Heights we can call for a tow."

"No, not going skiing either, because I would DIE in a survival situation, that's why."

"Yeah, I know. I'm mean to my characters--but there's nakedness in the end!"

*  *  *

Okay-- so this doesn't seem like I'm leading you astray--

Familiar Demon is available for presale at DREAMSPINNER and AMAZON,

And Freckles --with it's adorable new cover-- will be available from DREAMSPINNER and AMAZON in March!

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm getting up early for some sparkling cider, the better to watch the ball drop tomorrow night!

Happy New Years Eve!


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