Dear Helpful Person...

To the person who posted the Yip Yip pattern on my FB group--Parker Williams, you know who you are...

First off, I would like to say, I had a handle on my Christmas crafting. I swear I did. I was going to make three of these things here:

And then I thought, "But that went so FAST! I'm just going to make a scarf for Chicken, and I'll use THIS pattern because it's really fast TOO."

this pattern, right here.

And then I started to make it, and it felt really easy. So I committed to making THREE OF THEM, except what I THOUGHT was easy was a bust because it turns out you have to do basic maths, and there's a stitch I don't understand and anyway, it took me two weeks. TWO WEEKS in the height of Christmas crafting season.

I can't do three of them. OMG I BARELY FINISHED ONE--and, honestly, it's almost twice as deep as it should be in the picture. Because maths, you understand.

Anyway, I decided to do THIS pattern, from the Lion Brand Touch of Alpaca ball band, because hey, it's quick, it's easy, and I think I can finish three of them in OMG TWO WEEKS? IS THAT ALL I HAVE?

Wait-- what about the cowls again?

Those can wait.

BUT I have two weeks to make those big scarves and suddenly, SOMEONE, (WE ALL KNOW WHO!) puts THIS up on my feed. 

Press the link. PRESS IT, I TELL YOU.

Do you see that?

Those are YIP YIP STOCKINGS.

And... *sob* THEY'RE ADORABLE!

So I show these to Chicken thinking she'll talk me out of it-- she really liked the idea of her and her friends all having matching scarves, right?

But no. She's like THOSE hosers can have scarves, I want a YIP YIP STOCKING.

I tell her tough luck, I have no time and my budget has been spent.

So I tell Mate, thinking he will LAUGH at me, because seriously, YIP YIP STOCKINGS?  But he takes one look at the pattern and goes, "Oh. Oh yeah. You need to start those in January and make them for EVERYBODY WE KNOW!"

*sob*

You all... I've got yarn. I mean, lOTS AND LOTS OF YARN. So much yarn. And every new pattern means I need to buy MOAR YARN.

Those Yip Yip Stockings don't come cheap-- but... *sob* Did you SEE THEM?

HOLD ON BOYS, MOMMY'S COMING!!!!!!!!!!