Me: What do you want for your birthday?
ZB: I got nothing. I'm fairly content.
Me: *pulls hair out*
* * *
Me: Do you want to be a ventriloquists dummy wearing Dad's lederhosen for Halloween?
ZB: No, I'd rather be Morty. All I have to wear is a yellow T-Shirt.
* * *
Me: Go boop your meep.
ZB: *pets his cat*
* * *
Me: That's great! You got a part in the play! What is it!
ZB: Two lines. Ten words. I'm Jim.
Me: Well, congratulations, Jim. You'll do great!
ZB: I already memorized the lines!
* * *
Me: So, how was school?
ZB: Great! I saw two dogs humping on my way to the car! Want to see a picture?
* * *
ZB: How's politics today, Mom?
Me: Dismal.
ZB: I'll send you kitten memes. They help.
* * *
ZB: *picks up majestic gray floof* Hey, Dewey--judged anything to death today?
Dewey: *cats*
ZB: Just remember--I feed you. That gives me extra points so you should let me live.
* * *
ZB: What's the difference between a starting line and a finish line?
Me: Oh dear god...
ZB: Well, one is where things begin and the other one is somewhere in Finland...
Me: *screams*
* * *
Happy birthday, ZoomBoy. I've got a thousand anecdotes about you, a thousand wonderful quirky geeky hilarious conversations, a thousand moments where you made me laugh, made me think, or made me proud.
I love you bigger than sky and deeper than blue, my little man, my Cave Troll, my ZoomBoy. Keep doing you--there's not a soul on earth who could do it better.
Happy Birthday to ZB!
ReplyDeleteHappy birthday, ZoomBoy!
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