Christmas Shopping--Mate and I

"Okay, so Squish gets the--"

"We already got her the---"

"But what do we have at home?"

"I forget-- did you get ZoomBoy the--"

"I thought you got him the--"

"But what did you order from the place?"

"Do they both get clothes?"

"Do they both need clothes?"

"But they always get clothes--and pajamas!"

"Pajamas! For the big kids! Does T need pajamas?"

"Does Chicken need pajamas?"

"Chicken lives in pajamas--these will do nicely, and Squish?"

"I have no idea."

"This!"

"Looks like a sweatshirt--she'll wear it to school."

"But it's so FLUFFY!!!"

"Just no."

"Fine. Minions as reindeer, and a sweatshirt and slippers and--"

"I was a in a phone coma. Put most of that back."

"Shit."

"Now Big T?"

"Those won't fit him."

"Do they have some that fit him?"

"No. Pennies tomorrow."

"Do we have to go tomorrow?"

"I don't know--what time is it now?"

"It's time to get in line, because we have to pick them up."

"Dammit. Can we get them this--"

"No."

"Or this?"

"I don't even know what that is! How about an electronic chess set?"

"Do they have those now?"

"Apparently not since the nineties. Oops."

"Sorry, hon."

"No worries, there's an app for that."

"But the thing, the thing for Squish, the thing you hate--"

"Yeah, fine, we need that."

"Yeah we do."

*in tandem* "HOLY FUCK WHERE ARE ALL THE LEGOS?"

"Well shit, Toys R Us Tomorrow?"

"And the place for the thing."

"And Pennies."

"And Hot Topic."

"And the place with the puzzles--"

"And you know what this means?"

*in tandem*  "HOLY SHIT WE HAVE TO GO TO THE MALL!"

And the line and the line and the line and the--

"Scuse me while I go get toothbrushes!"

And the line and the line and the line and the--

"And won't my parents friend's like this?"

And the line and the line and the line and the--

"Did we get anything for--"  "And what about--"  "And oh crap we forgot and--"

*in tandem*  "OH MY GOD, WE'RE DONG THIS TOMORROW!"

And the line and the line and the--

*in tandem*  "WE HAVE OUR OWN BAGS FOR THAT!"

"Great-- that's $.35 off."

*collective sigh*

*in tandem*  "After we get the kids, maybe we can go down for a nap..."