Did you hear that? He said that children lied their heads off! He said "I was dead at the time! I was on the moon! With Steve!" So now we know who it was that made your children do that awful thing--smack their sisters, kick the dog, break the tchotchkes-- all of it! We have a scapegoat!
All you need is a Steve.
Ladies and gentleman (one, at the least!)
Meet Steve.
Now, I confess, I had a certain agenda when we went to the Pet Smart kitten adoption with their crazy zealot people (Okay--sweet--terribly sweet, but when Chicken confessed that we let her cat Gordie go outside, the poor woman burst into ACTUAL TEARS for fear of her poor baby's life. Nice, but like I said, uhm, a little bit cat crazy) and their claustrophobic adoption set up. (No room. And people keep trying to get by in order to buy their dog food. The NERVE!) Anyway.
I was going in there for a Steve.
Chicken, Big T and I had been throwing this quote back and forth for weeks--that, and this movie character right here--
Pretty much cemented the deal.
We needed a special kind of cat. We needed a cat who could knock over the food, get the dog to eat it, and then set the dog up to get yelled at for playing in the trash. We needed a cat who would pounce on our faces at night and then be gone before we could do more than sit up and wonder "Whathefwa?" We needed a cat who could hump a ball of yarn into wool spaghetti, then blame it on the kids and make that charge stick.
Regardless of gender, regardless of color, regardless of age, we needed a Steve.
We think she's perfect. Welcome to the family, Steve--we promised your former owner who is nuts that we wouldn't let you outside.
Welcome, Steve!
ReplyDeleteYea, the shelter people here are crazy that way, too. I had to swear (with crossed fingers) that we would keep our cats inside. They are inside, sometimes.
ReplyDeleteWelcome to Steve. Mr. Izzard is one of my favorite comedians. "I am an executive transvite" is one of my favorite lines.
I use I was dead at the time at work quite a bit, don't think half of them get it.
ReplyDeleteSteve's going to be a heart breaker.
Priceless! Steve is perfect! And I loved that the Pet Smart lady actually broke into tears. I adopted a Cricket myself, and he has been a holy terror to the other two ever since. Cricket definitely has essence-of-Steve in him, but he's just so darn cute when he's sleeping. And he has hung a sign around my neck that says "Mine." I am sure your family will love your Steve!
ReplyDeleteHi Steve!
ReplyDeleteSteve is cute, everyone needs a cat like that, Eddie Izzard ROCKS!
ReplyDeleteSteve, are you sure you know what you're in for? Unstinting love? Huge hugs and jammy kisses?All the yarn you can chase? Oh, the life of Steve is good!
ReplyDeleteHi, Steve! Welcome to the madhouse. Love Eddie Izzard. Thanks for the laughs.
ReplyDeleteYou lucked out Steve! A home where you will be loved, won't get yelled for being a cat and have the opportunity to have your face in a blog. What more could a cat want?
ReplyDelete