Bits and Pieces

And TODAY'S songworm is...



Now, for anyone wondering what makes my songworm hall of fame, it's usually anything that comes up on the iPod and I find myself singing out loud--for the next 24-36 hours. This one's special. It showed up on the iPod and Chicken and I started singing it together at the top of our lungs. *sniff* Good mother/daughter bonding, right there.

For the record, Chicken and I have a plan. In fifteen years, we're gonna grab my stepmom and Squish and go on an all-girl cruise. My stepmom's gonna play tennis and go rockclimbing, because at 75 she'll still be quite fit. Chicken and I will lounge on the deck with sweet alcoholic drinks and read every book we've wanted each other to read forever. Squish will be nineteen-- she'll be in the high roller's bar, finding a sugar daddy that she can A. outsmart, B. make richer, and C. who will support her in the manner which will require her to carry small dogs in purses. Right now, that seems to be her thing.

It's been a busy couple of days--I feel bad. Everybody who's used to me visiting the blog, I've been THINKING about visiting and commenting, but even though I've been at the computer, I've been proofing Bella and, just seeming to take care of business all day. I admit to being seized by the dragon, but that's been more of a luxury than the time suck, and I can't even put my finger on one thing that's got me busy! Just... stuff! Surfing the stock photo archives to help find a cover for Talker--that sucked up a couple of hours. (Not complaining-- also got to cruise a very lovely gallery of a talented artist and say, "Hey--I'd like to write a story to that!") Various and sundry stuff... frustrating stuff. Stuff like, we took pictures a month ago, and I have to pick them up, but I have NO EARTHLY REASON TO VISIT THAT WAL-MART EXCEPT FOR THE PICTURES! Stuff like, taking the kids to see a movie because they're driving me apeshit! Anyway-- busy stuff, and I hates it.

I miss my buddies!

So I'll probably be by tonight for a quick update, and in the meantime, I've got a couple of short-takes from my weird neck of the woods.

This starts with me--having one of those weird conversations with real people, when I'm ACTUALLY on the phone with Mate!

Me: "Omigod-- Big T, is that your KARATE UNIFORM?"

T: "Yeah, so?"

Me: "It's pink!"

Mate: "What's pink?"

Me: "T's gi!"

Mate: "T's what?" (You have to remember that we actually CALL T, 'T'--the only kid we don't call by the blogname is Zoomboy. But he's starting to request Zoomboy now, so, seriously-- tees jee... just sounded hella funny!)

T: "Pink is the new manly color."

Me: "Good. You're the man!"

Mate: "How pink is it?"

Me: "Easter egg pink. Squish has dresses less pink than that thing!"

Squish (from other room): "I HEAR YOU! STOP LAUGHING AT ME!"

Chicken: "We're not laughing at you! We're laughing at T's pink karate pajamas!"

Squish: "PINK'S NOT FUNNY!"

And I don't remember much after that... I was laughing too hard. It's possible I lost consciousness for a second or two.

And Squish was overtired tonight. We got her a cheap toy at Wal-Mart (because I was in Wal-Mart, that's why) and it was (you guessed it!) a little stuffed dog in a tiny handbag. (She has lots of these toys. Something about a puppy in a purse just tickles her little squishy soul.) Anyway, she came out looking for it. I told her to look on the couch, and in her room, and... well.. whatever. And then, while she was aimlessly wandering, her brother taunted her with a juice box she couldn't open and the whole thing ended with her running to throw herself on the bed wailing, "ALL I WANT IS MY DOG IN A BAG!"

I found her dog, put her to bed, and thought seriously about putting that on a bumper sticker. I mean... damn. So random-- and yet so totally hilarious. Me likey.

And finally? I was giving Chicken a hug and I noticed an anomaly.

"Holy shit, Chicken-- are you holding your bra together with a "Swatch first!" button?"

"Yeah, mom. And good on you for knowing why that was there!"


Yeah. They're mine.

And finally? Bella's on the Coming Soon page. In case anyone wanted to read the blurb or anything...