Thursday, August 1, 2019

Evolution TV

I am trying to turn the television off. That's it. Just off.

Mate: Okay, so take that one--the red one--and go all the way to the right.

Me: Done.

Mate: Now click the power off button.

Me: Done.

Mate: Now the other remote--

Me: I can get it from here.

Mate: Well you seem to have trouble--

Me: There are five different machines to make this happen. What in the hell-- you people take a simple device and make five different--

Mate: My people?

Me: Men. This is men. This is without a doubt, MEN. YOU PEOPLE take a simple idea--an elegant idea--like the television--

Mate: Wait, five?

Me: Yes five.

Mate: Five machines.

Me: Yes five machines. There are five machines involved here.

Mate: What in the--

Me: There's the PS4--

Mate: It isn't even on!

Me: WELL THEN WHY DID I HAVE TO USE THE REMOTE?

Mate: Fine!

Me: So there's the PS4, there's the whatever other box that is, there's the red remote, there's the black remote and there's the television--

Mate: YOU'RE COUNTING THE TELEVISION?

Me: The television started it.

Mate: So a laptop is three devices?

Me: It's one. It is self-contained.

Mate: Unless it's a keyboard attached to a dongle.

Me: THAT is not my idea. You did that. You attached things to my computer and said, "Well, where. This is what you should do." But I've taken it other places--it's really very self sufficient without the two dongles and the keyboard and the mouse.

Mate: But those things help you.

Me: But they're complicated.

Mate: You're awful.

Me: Want a remote?

Mate: Sure?

Me: WHICH ONE?????? 

Mate: You're still awful.

Me: Fine. I'm awful. Go count your technology bits. It will make you feel better about my awfulness. They're hanging out all over the place.

Mate. Fine. Just remember--turn on the box, and the TV, and the X-Box.

Me: I'm going to go type on my keyboard attached to my dongle attached to my laptop. Because THAT I understand. 

1 comment:

  1. PRICELESS! �� By the way .. what is a dongle .. my mind is just to dirty today .. I need to vacuum it! Keep up the conversation .. that's what marriage counselors leads to a "good" marriage .. of course they do not address multiple remotes or dongles .. hahaha �� ��

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